4 years 2 months on testosterone
It doesn’t always hurt, the ways my transition holds me back, but on days like this I think, my only dream in the world is to become a father, its the one thing I might never get.
Have you seen my beard?!
It takes a lot to take a man like me down, to beat him senseless enough that he won’t get up and fight anymore.
I’ve been ripped open, and cut up and bled from ever inch of the body I inhabit.
For a man like me to break, we have to be destroyed… And that’s what you’ve done.
You called me the one thing you can never take back.
So no it doesn’t matter if you’ve supported me from day one or if you stand up on tv and say “I love my SON”. You broke a piece of me, that I can never get back, with one word.
Today my friend Alex and I took his dog to PetCo so that she could get a photo with Santa. This has been a tradition for his family for years and it being his first year since his grand mother passed away it was really important to him. When we arrived at the store they did not have a Santa because they were unable to hire one for the day…however they did have a Santa costume. Gotta say I love the BEARD! Haha
It takes a real man or woman to admit they have a problem. It’s time I admit I may have one… Searching for a sexologist to handle the dysphoria I can’t get a grasp on
Tomorrow is December 10, 2013, a day I never thought I would live to see, let alone celebrate with a supportive family. You see, for those that don’t know, tomorrow is the 4 year anniversary of my first testosterone injection ever. That means just 4 years ago today I took the first step of a life long process to become happy and myself…I was a junior in high school and I am currently a junior in college, I don’t know what you think, but I think that’s something to celebrate!
Is that a girl or a boy? And you smile because today maybe you might just pass. But then you see their eyes register no facial hair, no knot in your throat, no bulge in your pants. They say it again, louder, tauntingly.
Is that a girl or a boy. This time they know the answer and they just want to see you squirm.
And you do.
And they snicker.
“IT” performed by Kavindu “Kavi” Ade.
There are no words for the emotions that this video causes.
All I have to say is wow.
Holy Shit… Just WOW 🙌
My heart melts for this
Made me cry, had to actually walk out of a room full of people and listen to it 3 times lying in my bed… This is beautiful, and tragic and perfectly damaging.
I am not perfect. I am not the best person, or friend or son or brother. I make mistakes and I let people down. But that doesn’t matter because when I die people won’t remember that one fight we had about that stupid thing, hopefully they will remember that time I drove 6 hours to save them in a snow storm, or when I stayed up all night to hold their hair while they were sick. Hopefully they’ll remember what a good father I was or that everyday I tried my best to be better. That’s the kind if man I am.
I’m watching “Boys Don’t Cry” surrounded by a group of my closest friends and even with a Transman on the tv and accepting people all around me, I feel emasculated and weak… This movie gets me every time.
There something about wearing boxers and nothing else. Make me feel complete, makes me feel like a man. Being shirtless, seeing my bare chest, it’s one of my biggest accomplishments and it feels just as incredible every time I take my shit off!
How do you call one of your children a freak? How do you think it? How do you say it? How could you possibly believe it? Your children are a part of you and all you’ve done is show us that we will be far better parents than the example you’ve set. It doesn’t matter how much time passes or how many revelations you have, once you’ve said something like that, you can never take it back, and it will never be forgotten.